We are the bully

 (Our local library, which is just a few blocks from our house, hosted several kid-friendly events the week of spring break. We took full advantage. Here is Trip petting an alpaca.)

We encountered our first bully at the library last week. The little boy was the same age as Trip and was intentionally being really mean to the other kids at the library. It started when he went up to Trip and swiped the marker out of his hand. Then he proceeded to color over or erase other kids' drawings. 


I wasn't really sure what my role should be, as his own mom witnessed all of these events and didn't do or say anything. When Trip and the other kids came to tell me what was going on, I suggested they try and play somewhere else. That didn't work, because he just followed them. 


Next, I decided to monitor the situation more closely. When the little boy followed us and bullied another kid in front of me, I said, "Please don't do that." He ran over to his mom upset, but she really had no response. The next thing I knew, he was tugging on my arm to show me something he had built with the blocks, like he wanted me to play with him. So, I just started to speak kindly to him and play with him. 


During this time, I was also trying to monitor Anna Kate. The little boy knocked her over to get to another toy. I told him that was too rough to be with a little baby, and he looked at me like no one had ever told him something like that before. It was like, he was drawn to me because I was providing the only "discipline" or even attention he had ever received. Hmmmm. 


So, in the car on the way home, and for the remainder of the week, Trip talked about the little boy who took his marker at the library. He couldn't understand why the little boy was acting mean, and he asked me at one point why I did not give him a swat! 


I tried to use the opportunity to explain what I had learned that day. That sometimes when people are mean to you, if you decide to be nice to them anyway, it might change the way they treat you. That we should try to be like Jesus in this way. That, "while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." 


It's easy to be mad at the bully, until you realize that we were the bully until Jesus changed our hearts.


Looking back, it was angering to watch my child get picked on, and in the moment all I wanted to do was "give swats" as Trip would say. But I am so grateful that God presented this little opportunity to talk to Trip about sin and repentance and salvation. We continue to see the same little boy at the library when we go, and even though we have had a few more incidents, I am praying for Trip that he sees an opportunity to be more like Jesus and to love this little boy anyway.